Yeah I'm Bi....And?

So I got into a conversation with a new friend about my sexuality. I am bi, I told this person that and a whole can of assholery opened upright inside of their mouth. All whole mess of stupidity came out. "Which one do you like more? Girls or guys?", " I don't care what anyone says, you have to like one sex more than the other", So how could you like both, I mean who would want to be in a relationship with someone who likes both sexes?" I sat back and let the steam escape from my ears and thought of the many times my bisexuality invoked such ignorance from people.
There was the one time with the cute girl who flat out told me that she didn't want to see me anymore after our first date because she doesn't date "fence sitters". Then there was another date that told me she would rather be with someone who is sure about their sexuality. And let's not leave out all of the guys who think that i am the automatic threesome experience. These experiences make me angry as hell. Who the fuck are these people to tell me what the fuck my sexuality is???!!!!!???? People see a couple of girls kiss for some male attention and automatically all bi women are doing it to be fun...... this shit irks me.
Bisexuality is as natural as being gay or straight and yet the concept of a person being equally attracted to men and women is lost on so many people. I'm tired of people telling me i'm confused, or that i need to make up my mind about my sexuality. My mind is made up, I'm bi, i'm not confused and i'm damn sure not sitting on a fucking fence. Bisexuality is not some invalid concept. Many people are bi, and it's ok. Anyone who says different can kiss my entire ass!!! Everyone need to leave us bisexuals alone.

health care debate

So today at work i had the pleasure of hearing people( all white btw) rant about the recently passed health bill. Now it's one thing to be opposed to something and state your reasons why, but these people were pulling the most rancid bullshit out of their asses. It started off with "oh this is gonna be so much money and the government can't run any kind of program before it gets out of control" which has some truth to it, however i think for the sake of being a compassionate and caring human being; you'd want affordable health care for your fellow Americans. But they all were talking about the cost of this bill ( which they kept referring to as universal healthcare *eye roll*) as if there aren't thousands of people who die every year from not being insured, as if the insurance companies don't suck money from people, as if a shit load of money isn't being pumped into a senseless war.
On top of all that inconsiderate shit, they had the nerve to talk about how if the bill got passed it would make hospital waits longer, people would get shitty health care coverage and there would be no money for doctors to make. Newsflash! It is already like that. I sat in the emergency room for an hour and while my head was bleeding from a dog bite. and once i was seen i had a nice fifty dollar emergency charge to pay. I had a obgyn lecture me on my "Overly active sex life" after telling him how many sex partners i've had. All of this happened under this wonderful model of current health care. This is all bullshit!
Some how through through this shit fest they went on about how fucked other countries medical schools are, how students come from all around the world to learn at our schools and go back to their country. They also went on about doctors in other countries not being able to make enough money. And there they went back to money. It's all about money to these people. It really bothers me when people talk about issues that ALL people should have. There was no acknowledgment about poor people who have the right just like them to have affordable health care, poor people don't exist in their world. This Shit just makes me sick....

The World I live in...

As a young black female in america i have faced a lot of bullshit in my life. From as far as i can think back i have been teased and tormented from everything to my dark skin, nappy head, to my taste in music and everything in between. Been ostracized by my own mother for being different. I fondly remember going home many days in elementary school crying my eyes out because kids at school would make fun of me and even hit me in the school yard. I remember crying at night knowing I'd have to return to the bullying the next day. Fast forward to middle school it was all happening again. I learned to control my emotions ( i.e. crying) better. However I started bottling my feelings. The boys would call me roach or tar baby and I'd just sit there and feel numb. The light skin girl in my class told me I was an ugly bitch. I'd act like i never heard her.
That lasted up until mid 7th grade where i just had enough of peoples bullshit. People talked to me like i was shit, I'd get right back in their face. I'd lash out and tell people off, throw text books at them and other things. I had a real attitude. Then i was know as the girl who didn't take anyone's mess, the ticking time bomb as one of my friends in middle school called me. During the mid elementary and middle school days home life wasn't the greatest so instead of crying all the time i lashed out and went toe to toe with people.
Once i reached High school i had a mixture of the "ticking time bomb" and the sad black girl. I was a mess. Depending on the day and my mood I'd either take the taunting or I'd lash out. All of high school all the way up to my first year of college were horrible because i had no other way of expressing my self except for anger or silence. I was horribly depressed and felt trap by my own mind. It was horrible. I felt like shit. I felt like nobody cared about me. Like i could day in front of a crowd of people and they'd all just walk over my lifeless corpse. I really felt like that. It all hit its peak my first year of college where i'd sit in class not making a sound, not answering a question, feeling awkward by just merely sitting in class with other people. I'd cry every night feeling a lone and feeling useless. Possible the worst time in my young life.
Thankfully, i now feel a lot better. Somewhere i gathered the courage to live my life and just be me. I know i am somebody, i know i am worth it and i love myself. I still have my days where i feel like shit but it is a lot better now. However i know out there there is a black girl who still feels like shit and worthless. I hope that she finds her way out of that whole or better yet has people around her that helps her. There is nothing like feeling like you are worthless.

Introduction...

.... So i started blog to put some of my thoughts out here on the interwebs. I have a lot of stuff on my mind all the time. I am one of those introverted folks and the people that i do talk to most of the time don't like to talk about shit that matters. So i figured that i could at least have a platform to talk about things that interest/effect me and people who look like me.
Anyway, i'm kind of pissed off all the time( you know having a vagina and being black and all) and am tired of that.....hopefully me writing and blogging about it will help :)

Besides being angry...... i'm in art school for photography, i'm a vegetarian, i rock an awesome fro, i'm from philly, i'm a cat lady and i'm young.....there is hope yet. So there it is my introduction outta the way